Chinderella – it’s an orthognathic fairytale, you see.

August 7, 2008

People’s reaction, part I*

Filed under: Uncategorized — chinderella @ 6:01 pm

I expected that this surgery – LeFort I + BSSO- would change my face, and not necessarily in a subtle way. That was fine, subtlety wasn’t what I was after. As well as a competent occlusion, I wanted balance and harmony; I expected to look friendlier, more approachable, less grumpy. I think I can safely report success on that front.

Seeing people post-surgery has been a joy all in itself, you know.

Aunt and uncle : hand clasped over mouth : Oh! Well, it changes you.

Mother’s many friends : two hands over mouth, raised eyebrows: Oh! It does change you!

Oh, really? In a ‘I’m sorry you’ve had acid poured on your face‘ kinda way, or in ‘ I wonder why you bothered, you’re just as fugly as you were before’? Is that all there is to say? Was it a Terrible Mistake? I mean, I don’t expect people to start crying with joy, drop to their knees and kiss my feet or anything. Just say it was worth it, or simply add ‘in a good way’ to the very neutral, slightly worrying statement of change.

While Supportive Friend #1 said nothing, not a single word, Supportive Friend #2 said : you look exactly the same as before. But are you sure you lost weight? Bastard. Anyway, I know I don’t look the same, so what’s the deal there?

And my favourite, today’s effort, my brother’s : Bloody hell! You’re totally different! He did a great job! You don’t look like a pitbul anymore..or a rottweiler.

I guess I’ve got to take the bad with the good. If I think about it, it’s almost encouraging, isn’t it.

* I’m quite certain there will be more.. I’m meant to go back to work on September 4th, and face 325 people in one go. Oh the joy. I might have to wear my ‘No M’am, this wasn’t plastic surgery’ tshirt.

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9 Comments »

  1. I’m all about finding harmony and balance, so congrats on achieving that goal. As for the rest of the lot, perhaps they would benefit from taking a few etiquette courses!!! It is interesting to note what people say about the recovery. I had a friend tell me how much “self-confidence” I must have for posting “unflattering” post-op pictures on my blog. I never thought I was “brave” for doing that. I just shake my head and think, “weirdo,” whenever I hear those kinds of comments! :0) M

    Comment by Michelle — August 7, 2008 @ 6:45 pm | Reply

  2. Y’know, I find this post sad. Sad that your brother, whilst possibly trying to be funny, deflect and in his own bizarre way say you’re attractive, and you that you ever thought you were ‘fugly’. You’re not, you never were, now you’re more beautiful than ever. It’s not that I’m bound to think this. It’s the truth. Some peoples thoughtlessness is almost enough to make one cry.

    Comment by B — August 7, 2008 @ 8:52 pm | Reply

  3. I think you look great. Maybe the reason people aren’t adding “in a good way” is that they don’t want it to be taken the wrong way. For example, if someone said to me “you look much better than before” I think I’d have my feelings a little hurt, like “oh.. did I look that horrible before?”

    I think you look great, though. 🙂

    Comment by Kam — August 7, 2008 @ 10:28 pm | Reply

  4. Yay! It seems you are extremely happy with the result of your surgery. I am so happy for you! *sigh* I can’t wait to be happy with some results!

    It is a subtle change I think… and you look fantastic!

    Comment by Holly — August 8, 2008 @ 12:55 am | Reply

  5. God I’m really simultaneously dreading and excited about this aspect of surgery… You do look fab hun, but then you were striking before too! I know that it has made the world of difference to you though, not matter how ‘subtle’ the rest of the world perceives it, because that’s how I’m going to feel I think.

    You do realise that give it few weeks everyone will have forgotten what you looked like before! 🙂

    Glad the recovery is still ticking along nicely xxx

    Comment by V — August 8, 2008 @ 1:05 am | Reply

  6. I think you look great. I would be very pleased by your results. Sometimes people have a hard time adjusting to change. I don’t think it is a extreme change but it is flattering. Enjoy the new you!
    Mo-Mo

    Comment by cookieyum — August 8, 2008 @ 3:49 am | Reply

  7. It can be funny (strange even) how people respond after something has been physically changed on a person. For some there can be a feeling of envy and for others admiration for the courage the person showed having surgery … still others don’t know what to say and sometimes respond in the strangest ways. Sounds like you’ve already met a mixed bunch! 🙂

    All the best with returning to work … and I think your T-Shirt sounds like an awesome idea!

    Comment by Karen — August 10, 2008 @ 12:55 pm | Reply

  8. I think the changes, while subtle, are good. I feel like people are afraid to tell you that you look better than before simply because they’re afraid you’ll take it the wrong way. You are not fugly in any way (and never were!).

    Take care!

    Comment by Steph — August 10, 2008 @ 9:31 pm | Reply

  9. Ah, orthoblogpeople, you’re kind as always.

    I also forgot to say that French people don’t know how to pay a straightforward compliment without a lot of training beforehand.

    Comment by chinderella — August 11, 2008 @ 7:09 pm | Reply


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