Chinderella – it’s an orthognathic fairytale, you see.

March 27, 2008

The Doctor will see you now

Filed under: Uncategorized — chinderella @ 6:47 pm

1. Tuesday afternoon. I’m sitting in The Chair while Dr G is checking my bite.

– You wanna know what I really love, what I really live for? He asks.

I raise a politely inquisitive eyebrow.

– My motorbike. In my family we’re all completely bonkers! he laughs. With perfect teeth. Mad! we’re mad!

I refrain from commenting that, perhaps, mentioning a love of risking one’s life as well as other people’s might not be the most reassuring thing I could hear at this stage.

My daughters are just like me! I’ve had so many accidents.. There’s no point doing anything if there’s no risk involved! Better than dying of cancer, dontcha think?

I cross my arms, my legs, I’m probably starting to look cross-eyed, too. Does this guy not get body language? Or is he so in love with himself and his perpetual tan that he can’t?

2. The ortho he usually works with is also there, infinitely calmer, looking slightly embarrassed. For the two and a half hours I stay in the room with them for this consultation, I won’t even crack a smile. I refuse to be dazzled, or even amused; Call me tight-assed if you will. I will, but that’s ok.

3. How can I disassociate my personal judgment – I’m dealing with a complete wanker- from his professional reputation? This guy is supposed to be one of the best. He’s operated on my own mum. His record is excellent.

4. Thursday morning, another chair, another white coat.

Doctor G is unsufferable, says this colleague of his. He’s over the top, full of himself, he’s probably got ADD, he’s the king of bling, he likes blonde bimbos and gold jewellery. But he’s very, very good at what he does and if I were you I would tell him to shut up, then pick him as your surgeon. You can trust him.

Ok, then.

June 13th. Friday. Bring it on!


March 26, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — chinderella @ 7:09 pm

Blogpeople! This blog! Is a forgottten mess, a cobwebby pit, a dusty, mouldy corner; I haven’t been near it for so long. So, and not necessarily in this order:

1. I do have a surgery date; it’s a real one, I’ve written it down in my diary in ink and capital letters. I’m ready to share it with the world ( all 4 of you): June, Friday 13th! That’s right.

2. No, I am not superstitious. On the other hand, I did consider it well: superstition is little like a placebo, it only works if you believe in it; what if the surgeon is? what if one of the nurses is? Would one superstitious bastard be enough to eff up the whole surgery? We’ll find out!

3. Doubt has been crawling in, blogpeople. You see, since the beginning of this (lengthy, torturous, costly) orthodontic process, I have been told that I was in for surgery of both jaws, upper and lower. Yesterday I saw another surgeon, the one who might eventually carry out the surgery; he thinks that only the upper jaw might be necessary to get good results. He’s going to make all the calculations and things that surgeons do, get together with the ortho and get back to me.

4. that’d be good news. Don’t you think?

5. I have updated the ‘what’s wrong with me?’ section at the top, and it’s got a picture.

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